Better

I think it’s time that I reveal it
‘Cause I believe it
It’s better. ~ Better

I don’t know if I have ever told you this-  but I want the world. I want my hair to fall in perfect layers of color over a size 8. I want to fight for young women to be better women, I want to stand for women for change. I want to teach for a better world. I want  to find the perfect love, and keep the crazier friends. I want to run a marathon. I want to be on TV. Write a book. Buy a house. Travel the world. Gaze at stars as if they are endless. Lead at work. Watch every movie that ought to be watched. Read dusty old libraries out of their books, and swim for hours and hours.

It is maddening. It is the sweet torture of never enough. It is a sly promise of getting there. The unending despair of never there. It is quiet, and fervent, and evermore…

It can end ever so achingly in the disarray of the perfect mechanics of a flight landing. It can end ever so slowly- but gloriously in a fairy tale.

Each day is con-fuddling.